Just another WordPress.com site

Latest

Where are your hospital manners?

We have at one time or the other been patients. Close family members, friends, relatives,  colleagues and those dear to our hearts have been hospitalised too. When a patient is in hospital and especially when one’s condition is not stable, relatives and family tend to be overcome by anxiety, tension and stress.

Patients dearly cherish hospital visits which give them an opportunity for encouragement, moral and physical support. Unfortunately, not everyone always has goodwill towards the patients or their families. Some hospital visits are abusive and depressing rather than exhilarating. Some visitors even silently or verbally wish for patients to die.

Do your hospital visits make the patient better or worse? When you visit a patient, it is important to carry your hospital manners along with you. Commenting within the patient’s hearing that he or she has only 24 hours to live and will not make it, can be distressing to the patient. This is purely bad manners. Careless, reckless and insensitive talk must be discouraged by all means.

Grudges

Patients tend to feel that relatives and friends owe them a visit. Do not promise a patient a visit unless you are sure to come because patients tend to hold grudges when you do not turn up. They are already vulnerable and may feel rejected , abandoned or even deserted. This may result in self-pity.

‘Get Well’ card

One should not celebrate over a patient’s illness or hospitalisation. Avoid malicious and negative remarks around the hospital as these thoughtless comments may worsen the patient’s condition when they get to hear of them. Telling a patient they look as thin as a rake and then bursting into tears is not in the patient’s best interest. Telling them off over their illness is extremely unkind. If you have no words of encouragement for the patience then silence may be very good for you. Better still would be a ‘Get Well’ card.

Some visitors carry other medicine to the patient and convince them to take them thus interfering with the patient’s regimen. Giving the patient charms or any other medicine can cause serious repercussions as the patient is already on prescribed medicine.

Visiting during meals, not because you want to assist feed the patient but to take advantage of the patient’s poor appetite is bad manners indeed. Gobbling up fruits from the patient’s fruit basket  and drinking all the juice as if they will never recover is poor manners.

A genuine smile

Give the patient a genuine smile. There is no point going to visit a patient you do not like and then laughing very loudly during the visit, especially when you know the patience has extreme headaches.  Body language experts can easily identify wrong body language. A lopsided smile may in fact mean you disapprove of the patient’s condition. Others take great lengths to investigate the patient’s personal life. They move around the hospital making friends with nurses and patients’ relatives to get background for gossip.

Family space

Please give the patient and his or her family personal space. Use wisdom to discern whether your visit may not be suitable for the patient. Kindly avoid distressing the patient with unusually long prayers or trying to push the patient to accept the Lord as their personal saviour when all they need to do is to sleep. Along with your manners, you could carry with you fresh flowers, an assortment of fruits, bottled water and of course a great and genuine smile.  One can carry a range of toiletry like toothbrush, toothpaste, face towels, a comb, bathroom slippers and a change of underclothes.

The don’ts

Do not carry alcohol, cigarettes, charms or any other form of drugs to your patient, They will cause more damage than you could ever conceive. Happy visit!

 

 

 

Advertisements

Oh these wordpress.com deadlines

It is a Sunday morning and rather than sleep in and have a lazy restful day, WordPress.com deadlines are keeping me on my toes.

It all started when I got a message in my inbox saying someone had thought my post was awesome. Highly impressed by this I started clicking the ‘follow’ and ‘like’ buttons, not realising what a loadful I was piling in my mail.

Now I am late with reading all the blogs in my mail. There are posts that I have not opened since last week, there are comments to be moderated. There are some breathe-taking pictures that I had promised myself to go through again when I got time and I want to watch my favourite Soap Opera on TV. I have to check my stat mail urgently to see how many viewers have visited my blog. Of course this is the part I love the most!’Now where do I start? The Freshly Pressed posts look inviting. Do I read all of them or just click “like” on each one so that  fellow bloggers think I did read their post. Oh I feel so guilty. I am overwhelmed I must confess. There are all my blogger friends with all these brilliant posts, how can I not read an interesting headline from with findinggravity who blogs on Ten Things I Learned From My Father. I am about to skip some mail but curiosity gets the better of me and soon I am reading Snotting black’s This One For All Bloggers Out There.

Then Blogger Maryanne Pale stops me dead on my tracks with My First Guest Blogger Brian Misinale, her cousin who does a rather moving piece, My Heart and Soul. I sympathise with the twins who had cancer and the fact that one of them passed away. Misinale’s new family, he has twins too, brings a smile to both my face and my heart. There’s the Blurred Line and Guitarmonk, Creative Splurges and Photobotos. Defining my dash with Boldness shares how you can face head on whatever stands in your way and In My Opinion reveals her childhood and how mothers’ comments can really bring one down. Then I meet know the sphere with zero? raising pertinent issues on how some people use arguments while taking absolutist positions and Grumpy comments with People Person. Then monicahm‘s wonderful photos of an African sunset makes me nostalgic. It is a beautiful and positive image of Africa away from the wars and starving children. It is already lunchtime so I take a break and quickly serve myself bits of chicken, ugali (maize flour gruel) and cabbage and back to work.

I watch ooamerica: ooa’s cute video on taxis and I absolutely enjoy the ride and the dance.  I check the mail and the list is still rather long. I have about 50 posts on unedited politics. When I subscribed to unedited politics, little did I know that I would be reading President Kennedy’s Speeches on Religion. Rick Santorum Speech at Lake of the Ozarks, Missouri, Gringich, Romney and Obama and all other famous American persons.

s

Sleepy Simba

My eyes are tired and soon I am fast asleep with so much knowledge in my head and lots of company. I may not be able to read all of them today. But now I fully understand if there are no comments on my post.  I have truly come to appreciate when someone takes their time and reads through my blog. Anyway, the WordPress.com to do items have to be done no matter how late inthe night. A Blogger’s got to do what a Blogger’s got to do.

Love me, please

“Love me please,” she begged him as she hang on to his knee, tightly.”Love me, please darling, I beg you, love me.” Instead of the hug she expected from him, he roughly shoved her off , shouting, “get off me, leave me alone!”

What had happened that such a man who once loved her with all his heart and would have done anything for her, had suddenly changed and no longer wanted anything to do with her.

“I love you, darling, please don’t do this to me!” She begged, tears flowing endlessly down her face. He sneered at her, showing complete indifference and contempt. What was the world coming to? Jude, her Jude, the man who has once literally walked on the grounds she treaded on had become a complete stranger! She could no longer recognise him.

“There are so many men in the world. I don’t understand why you are clinging on me! I am giving you the freedom to go out and marry them. I do not love you anymore! You can even leave now if you want!”

The words hurt. “What have I done? What is it that is so unforgivable? I have been faithful to you. I have been submissive, I have never hurt you!”

“I don’t want to hear any of this!” He said as he put on his coat and walked out of the house.

What had happened? Was this her man Jude or this was someone else? Why was he doing this to her.

She got up from the floor and ran after him, begging him to love her. He ignored her, turned on the engine and drove off. She stood in the rain, numbed, feeling nothing but pain deep inside her heart. “He doesn’t love me. He doesn’t love me any more. As if the pounding rains agreed with her, they washed away her tears in sympathy at her plight. The plight of a love lost.

She woke up with a start to find Jude embracing her, holding her tightly inside their warm bed. “You were screaming in your sleep. Had a nightmare?” He asked gently. “Just a bad dream, I guess!” She responded, still feeling dazed. “Do you want to discuss it?” “No, oh no. I don’t even remember anything,” she lied.

She hugged him ever so tightly as if she would never let go. She felt lucky that it was only a dream and he was right here with her, ever so warm, ever so loving. This charming sweet man lying next to her was the real Jude, the Jude she knew and loved. “I love you,” she whispered and bit his ear playfully. He kissed her back. Soon, she was fast asleep.

Surviving Crisis

Everyone has gone through one crisis or another. It is never easy. It is so difficult to face life when the worst happens, when your worst fears are confirmed.

Crisis comes when least expected. It sneaks into one’s life like a thief in the night. No warning, no preparation, no time to make amends. It could be the loss of a loved one, an accident that leaves one paralysed for life. You could just walk into hospital for a normal check up and there it is right on the screen, you have been diagnosed with cancer, diabetes, epilepsy, hypertension and God knows what else. You have been trying to get pregnant for the last ten years and when you finally succeed you lose your child in labour. Or you have tried to get a child for the last 20 years and your marriage is about to break up and women are being brought to your bed to give birth on your behalf.  When someone you had really trusted and confided in betrays you or someone just creates a big lie about you and jeopardises your love, family and career. For someone else it could be such a simple thing but when crisis strikes my friends, it is never easy to deal with.

It is a crisis when your partner abandons you because you have been diagnosed with cancer, HIV or a mental illness, when you need a kidney transplant or a dialysis. When that brilliant child you thought would bring the prize home is caught up with a drug cartel and no amount of rehabilitation will change the situation. Then you get a call to go and pick his body.

Crisis, how does one survive? When you lose your job at a time you really need it, when you get retrenched yet it is not your fault, when you commit adultery and the only person you have ever truly loves abandons you or you commit a crime and have to go to to jail.  When you look back at the poor relatives you brought up, educated and gave your best turn their back on you and talk ill of you now that they have made their wealth.

When you fail your exams abroad and you are expected back home and you have to move out of the University and play hide and seek with the police, washing cars, babysitting and then this College girl you fell in love with gets pregnant! When you look around and your love clock ticks but there is nobody to marry you or even ask you out for a drink.

Crisis happens my dear friends. Crisis visited me my friends when I got that call that changed my life forever. Dad and mum and sis involved in a car accident. They fell into the river. Dad died on the spot, mum was in a coma and we could not trace my sis anywhere. She was admitted in a hospital somewhere with broken ribs and legs. It was a crisis,. How could we bury dad without mum, her only love for 54 years?

But we survived the crisis, You can survive. We hang on to hope. Friends supported us. The Church prayed and visited. Relatives and neighbours condoled with us and consoled us. The bill was so high and we sold the property but we survived. You will survive my friends. Just hang in there. Take courage. Do not give up especially when it is too much. Troubles may gang up against you like the Dogs of Winter and maul you into unrecognisable pieces but you will survive. There is no night so long that the day will not break. And one day you will look back and wonder how you did it. You will survive. You will survive.

Aside

Happy No More

Image

Happy No More

Since my Dog Happy went missing one week ago, I am no longer happy. Someone unleashed him quietly in the dead of the night  and I am surprised he never barked or made any sound. Happy Dog, you have been such a faithful friend and I miss the way you wag your tail happily when I come home. I pray and hope that wherever you are, you are safe and that one day you will come home again. I miss you. I know you miss me too.

Aside

Happy No MoreSi…

Image

Happy No More

Since my Dog Happy went missing one week ago, I am no longer happy. Someone unleashed him quietly in the dead of the night  and I am surprised he never barked or made any sound. Happy Dog, you have been such a faithful friend and I miss the way you wag your tail happily when I come home. I pray and hope that wherever you are, you are safe and that one day you will come home again. I miss you. I know you miss me too.