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The Morning After Valentine.

It is the morning after. The morning after Valentine. Some have woken up on the right side of the bed. Others have woken up on the wrong side of the bed. Others are neither here nor there. Dazed, confused, ashamed of last night’s reckless actions. Yesterday, you wore red. Today you wear black. You are in mourning. But either way, love has left a mark.

Last evening the spirit of Valentine gave you the devil’s courage to propose to your man. But he scorned you, spurned you like hot charcoal, ridiculed you and disparaged you before his friends. And now this morning after you wake up having lost your pride and your self esteem. You are afraid to face the world.
It hurts doesn’t it, to learn that the man or woman you had entrusted your love with was fake and never loved you at all? You feel used and dumped after you bought your lover a Candle-lit dinner only for them to leave the restaurant with someone else. That the dinner that had started so well with lots of laughter ended up in a quarrel and resulted in the worst day of your life. The morning after when the morning pills are not available and your lover does not want to hear the truth…that you could be pregnant. So last night you waited at this restaurant for hours and ordered one glass of wine after another, but he never showed up. Last night she kept telling you on phone she was still at a meeting as you waited outside her office. And what a shock, when she walked out of the building with a bunch of red flowers in her hands and straight past you with her boss into his car. How so very very painful!
Yes it does hurt deeply that your husband did not show up at home last night and his phone was off the entire evening. That he went to Koinange Street and picked a Commercial Sex Worker but did not use a condom. How depressing when he arrived home in a woman’s red underwear, how disgusting! Many wake up today to the fact that last night love flew out of the window and today is a new beginning. That starting afresh is not always easy but it is possible.

Yes, it does hurt deeply when you got mail in your inbox from your lover’s other woman giving you details of their love notes, some with the very wordings that he has been sending you. So you thought it was the end of the world, threw tantrums like the terrible twos, cried yourself to sleep late last night and now the morning after, you wake up with red swollen eyes, afraid to go to work, afraid to be the source of all office rumour mongering. Cheer up. Everything will be okay. You will survive. You will forget.

The morning after you bought yourself red flowers and a red card, signed it with your left hand and sent it to yourself by securicor courier to impress your friends and colleagues. And now, the loneliness sets in as you wake up in your cold bed alone. With a headache and a terrible hangover. And you feeel fake and dishonest. It is okay. Cheer up, drink some cold water and take a good laugh at yourself. After all you are not the only one in such a mess. You have  twin brothers and sisters all over the world sharing your fate in this morning after Valentine’s Day.

Yet for many, the morning after is sweet. Some wear their shiny engagement rings and smile with sweet memories of last night, of a marriage proposal and a wedding in the offing. You are strutting along like a peacock, making wedding plans already, soon to appear in the popular wedding show. How lovely it is to have experienced love last night. The morning after, you wake up with a nostalgic smile of an evening well cherished, of a dream come true.

For some, what a lovely surprise it was last night when the wandering and philandering husband came home out of the blues and asked for forgiveness and a second chance. It was a great re-union and the sweet aftermaths live on the morning after.

For some how great to learn that someone actually appreciated you enough to give you a call, to send those sweet smses and to just say how nice you are as a friend. These are the little warm gestures that make the morning after feel wonderful!

But for all it was worth, for all the recklessness and disappointment last evening brought, it is not the end of the world. It is time to take the morning after in its stride and move on. Yesterday remains just that, history. Today is the day, shiny and bright and life gives you an opportunity to live and love again. As the wise men of old say, “Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.”

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